Abeyance

'Come to Me with your plans held in abeyance,' reads todays passage.  Abeyance, I had to look it up, is defined as a state of temporary disuse or suspension.  That's tough.  I typically have plans A,B, & C and many variations of each as well. To come to Him with that kind of trust, letting go of your own plans, and surrendering to His will is easily said or read than done.  I have great difficulty with this kind of trust.  


The only season in my Christian journey when I was able to have this kind of faith was around the age of 13, when I had accepted Christ as my savior.  I had amazing faith.  I really believed everything I read in the Bible.  I had no doubt that He was there.  It was because He had been showing up in my life daily.  In the most mundane situations I would see His hand.  It was as if He was wooing me.  You know, when you are first getting to know a significant other, you do the sweetest and most thoughtful things to let them know you are interested and would like to pursue them.  I would pray for the silliest things (in my teenage mind, no such things were silly, of course).  Nevertheless, He would grant my requests.  Those few years were the sweetest times in my relationship with God.  I guess the honeymoon stage usually is. 


'Do not blindly follow your habitual route, or you will miss what I have prepared for you.'  You have live deliberately.  I do wish I had that kind of faith again, perhaps this breaking down of all I know of God is the beginning.